The last 30 days of my life...

Recently, my best buddy was hospitalized. Apparently, he fainted and the clinic he visited to referred him for further check-up to a specialist. Me, being the mean soul I have always been, joked with him that he really is living Kal Ho Na Ho etc. I am mean I know but he knows too that I'd never wish for it to be reality.

At the end of the day, Terence stopped in his track after our visit and we talked bout life and it's journey, and he being the philosophical person, posed to us this simple question, 'what would you do if you have 30 days to live?'

Phenomenal as it may be, the thought was certainly inscribed in my mind. It couldn't have struck me at that moment, but the drive back last night was filled with that question.

Firstly, rather than being sorry and sorrowful, I'd consider myself lucky, most people meet the angel of death without a predetermined appointment and that is worst, others would have to deal with a traumatic experience such as terminal illness that gives you months and those who feel sorry for you start wondering, 'when will this end?' So having 30 days is not at all that bad. What would I do? Hmmm....

Firstly, I'd want to spend time with my family, dad and mum, preferably, I wouldn't want them to know but if there's no choice, I rather make for all the losses, till today, my dad still complains that I don't take the time to spend 5 minutes with them. So dad and mum, my time would be for you.

Secondly, my boys, Ariff, Farid and Ajju, you guys are more of friends than nephews, we had some greatest craziest moments... so in those last 30 days, we shall fill our evenings (as many as we can) with Winning Eleven on PS2 and this time round, I'd like to request Farid to have some compassion and not kick my a** that badly!

Friends... my camaraderie, my amigos y senoritas!!! Many friends but here's an ode to the fine men and women who makes Nexus life truly a worthwhile one, in no particular order coz we're all of different bodies but one mind and soul.

iMan, Terence, David, Mel, Lisha and Captain Salem you guys are the closest in my circle of friends, the people that I deal with on nearly-daily basis, not only do we meet at least 5 times a week, we could be hanging out the whole day and would still be chatting online at night or on the phone catching up on the tragedies we missed to share hehe... you guys are truly the gem of my life and I wouldn't know how best I could spend my last 30 days with you coz if I have it my way, I'd wanna haunt you guys... payback for sharing with me horror stories!!!

           

This also goes to other friends and business contacts whom I have known for years and this would be a very long blog full with list of names if I start rolling out but you guys know well who you are. You have stepped in my life bringing the best of moments and I am blessed to have your friendship... Especially Joanna, Ruthy, Lai, Mike, Lai Chi, Mei, and Bryan...

As I was sharing this with a friend today over the phone, she asked me, why isn't there a mention of the one I love? For the first time after a long time, I was able define it in the most sensible manner- every one of my relationships is a journey of self-sabotage that inevitably ends in a black vacuum of shattered expectations and despair..

As melodramatic this may seem, it made me realise how much everyone I deal with in life means to me, from bridging of alliance, to building synergies, teaching me life experiences, the meaning of love- the tortures of love, about faith, trust and living life itself.

The only regret I would have is not having my Bayerische Motoren Werke (BMW) 530i and a son whose name is Mikail Khan to carry on the destiny, but I believe God would've had his own reason for not allowing so. It's not the name that you left behind that matters, but the legacy you build that counts...

P.S. This is still an expressive writing and in reality, I still have one client concept brief to complete, so no more ranting on but work awaits, and if it happens to really be my last 30 days, the helm of Plan B shall be held by my capable partner, Lisha and I am sure you'd bring it to the level we envisioned it to be... may God be witchu!!!